We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
