Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
