Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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