she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
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