How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
