Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize