we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
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