Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
