Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
