The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I would ride that face into the sunset
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
