Say something about gay babies.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
