No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
