Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
