So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize
