Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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