who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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