i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
