whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
