I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
