people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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