I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
