but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
