It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
