I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
