got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Randomize
