real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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