There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
