i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
