thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
