i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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