he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
It's never too late to be topless.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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