you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
