Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize