Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
