I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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