Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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