My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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