sarcasm needs its own font
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
