It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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