Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
