stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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