so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
