Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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