did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
