I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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