why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
