We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I can't turn off my feet"
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
