They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Randomize
