i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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