I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
